Even now, lots of us suddenly are energized
Life is exciting. Whether you want to believe that or not is up to you, but if you thought about it for a minute you would find that even as there are a lot of things that go perceivably wrong on a daily basis, we are all in the middle of this really great, really exciting time in our lives that is more akin to an earthquake than a roller coaster.
Now is the time that we are beginning to see the pieces of our pain and our heartache as they all meld together into the beginnings of a newer version of our lives, and more importantly, our Selves.
I don't know about any of you, but I am so excited I could pee my pants...ok, maybe not, but you get it, right?
The more things change...
It is said that the more things in our lives change,the more they stay the same, and I am thinking it is like this on purpose. I mean, how much fun would it be if everything we did in life always stayed the same without the idea that we all have in our heads and because of our own life experiences that what happens now will happen again and again? If we stayed stuck to that premise of course we would get bored, and of course we would end up like a lot of people are right now - broke, bored, mad, but ever hopeful, at least the majority of us, that is.
There is that certain segment of the population that is always going to be with the idea in their heads that we are doomed to do things the wrong way, again and again, and to those people I can only say to kiss my Royal Hawaiian okole. If all you can do is continually see things happening over and over again and you have not yet learned anything at all, then you are a moron - you can change this. The problem is that you already have it set in your heads that this is going to happen over and over and over again, kind of like that sentence I just wrote.
The reason that you keep on going through what you go through is simple - you keep on thinking about whatever it is that keeps on popping up as a pain in the rear end in your life, and as you usually do, you complain and whine and bitch and moan, never realizing that all it takes is to simply learn to accept what is going on and then deal with it by moving on. You cannot get anywhere if you are stuck in park or neutral. You can stand on the gas pedal and waste your gas revving your engine but the same thing that has been happening will continue to happen - you will run out of gas.
Then you will be stuck...get it?
Preferring the 'maybe' over the guarantee...
I am a Pisces. It is the sign of the two fish swimming in opposite directions. I am good at being a Pisces. I am both outrageous and practical, daring and conservative, mouthy and proper, all at one time. One would think that I would be in a constant state of confusion if they were not paying better attention. I make an art of organized chaos. I cannot function without it. Thinking about a feeding frenzy in a pet store goldfish tank is the only way that I can describe it. The fish know which direction to swim in. They know instinctively where to go to get what they need.
This same thing can be said of people in general, and not only about Pisceans. People are great at being lost in their own self-imposed chaos, and they do this without thought. Problem is, they cannot get out of the confusion. What is worse is that they also cannot see the beauty which comes along with the confusion. Confusion is just another state of thought. If you could sort blocks you can sort thoughts. Seriously.
What I mean by people prefer the maybe versus the guarantee is that we are more prone to do things, even if those things bring us the pain that we cannot learn from because we are too damned stubborn to learn from them. We would sooner go through the guaranteed pain of not trying something new instead of dealing with the maybe that comes with not being sure of the outcome that a different decision, a different way of doing things, a different choice, would bring. We would sooner not try to make a living doing what we want to do because we cannot guarantee that we are going to make any money than we would going with the guarantee of being unhappy with what we are doing to support ourselves. Yes, you might be able to see it as "I only have to be here for x amount of time everyday, and besides, I make great money," and that would be a change in your thinking, but we all know that this is rarely the thing that happens. What normally happens is that we stay in a job that we hate for the money, and we carry that hatred around with us instead of the new thinking about that same crappy job.
We are more comfortable being uncomfortable and unhappy than we are willing to be momentarily uncertain and uncomfortable with where we are in life and in our job. I would sooner be happy with a job I loved, even if the pay was not all what I wanted it to be, than to be enslaved by a bunch of dead presidents. Doing that only allows us to direct our lives according to the money that we bring in. How sad is that? I mean, yes, having a lot of money is great - I know. I had a lot at one time. Yet, in all that time, in all that madness and all that gluttonous spending that I did over the years, I cannot recall too many times when the feeling of bliss washed over me as much as it does now when I write something, when I choreograph something, when I am busy creating something beautiful for the world to see.
You can't continue to drive yourself crazy over how much you do not have. That is over with. That is tiring. That is old. That is just no longer applicable to the way that you want to live your life. You've gotta believe me on this one. I am serious.
You can only be you, not the Joneses
You know them, the Joneses. They have everything. They are the happy couple that the rest of the hags in the neighborhood cannot stand (because she is just SO cute it is sickening and he is SO dreamy it just makes you want to hurl). They are those retirees who seem to never be at home (because they come from old money and how dare they live in suburbia instead of in some swanky retirement community). They are those people with whom we each have a problem with, or actually, who our egos have a problem with. We get jealous over silly things, and sometimes we are a mixture of jealousy and anger, and we are crazy, us humans - we prefer it this way!
We would rather wallow in our own feelings of unworthiness, in our own misgivings and assumptions about our neighbors according to our own experiences, our feelings, no matter what they are, good or bad, than we would to try to figure out why it is that what other people have is somehow better than anything that we have or can have.
Do you not know your own spiritual worth? I mean, come on! Look at the faces of the people who you have issues with and see pieces of your own self in their expression. Are they genuinely happy to see you and are you being the spiritual crackhead that you always are, giving them dirty looks and even muttering horrible things in their direction while at the same time you are waving and smiling? How confusing that is to your psyche and also, eventually, your Spirit.
You keep on messing with your Spirit (you know, that thing that you keep letting other people crush?), pulling it in opposite directions and hoping that it will remain in tact. The truth is that the Spirit is better than Tupperware, better than Timex, better than a lot of things, but we have to also remember that all those things all have a way of breaking down.
Hurry up and get here already!
There are some people reading this now who see themselves in this picture that I have drawn for you all. You are waiting for life to happen to you instead of you creating the one that you want!
Well, what the hell are you waiting for? An engraved invitation? You ain't gettin' one! It is time, NOW, to get up off of your draggin' ass and DO something instead of only complain about your sorry life. YOU are the one who matters most in the way that it turns out, and you are also the only one to blame if you never do anything to change it and it never changes. At least if you try to change something, you will know that you have tried.
STOP with the pitying - everyone, just stop it. So, you didn't get the girl, the job, the car, the house, the money, whatever. This means that there is someone who is more suited to you at this point in your life and that you have not been through what it is that you have to in order to get there. The job? What would have happened if you got it and all you saw as its value was its hourly wage? What if you would have gotten there and hated it more than the one that you have now? There is a reason for every little thing that you go through, that you suffer disappointment in not having, and until and unless you are willing to see the bigger picture in it all, you will always and only see your own life as a series of failures and things that just broke your heart.
Knock it off, would you? You can't see your own greatness if all you are focusing on is what you perceive is your weaknesses. It is not that you have weaknesses, as much as you have things that have to be worked through. We are so bound to the idea that who we are is what we do, what we look like, what we know, when in reality it is a nice mix of those things.
And the only thing that I can say about that is that it is really nice being mixed up all the time !!!
I LOVE YOU ALL !
...Roxanne...
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